The Ant Wars: Mercenary Campaign, Part 2

The brave knight I hired to vanquish our household enemy, the piss ant, had to be recalled. He had come out and performed nobly in his attempt to dissuade the invading hordes from entering our home. For a full week, my enemy was held at bay. On about d-day +8 the enemy had again breached our defenses, so I recalled our mercenary.

He returned, aerosolized d-limonene in hand. After a short debriefing of the operational status, he went on a mission to inspect the perimeter of our fortress to seek out the source of the breeches. Returning to the command center to report, his furrowed brow belied his distress. His search for the source of the breech had been unsuccessful.

So we decided another inspection was in order, but this time I joined our warrior as a guide. Soon we discovered a massive enemy supply line. We then followed this superhighway of formicidae out into the back yard. The supply line stretched well over 70 feet to the perimeter and then branched out to several parts of our home, but mostly in the kitchen.

A massive nest was discovered in our back yard. Together we disrupted the nest, poisoned the supply routes with orange oil, and then sprinkled a bait all around the well-camouflaged colony.

Within an hour, the ant invasion had abated. Today, several weeks later, the ants have yet to return.

Now that the natural balance has again been disturbed, I patiently and watchfully wait to discover where the next enemy will appear.

The Ant Wars: Mercenary Campaign. Part 1

Perhaps I was feeling a bit arrogant, as last spring's campaign ended with a touch of success. However, toward the end of the battle, I wondered if by reducing one species of ant I was not inviting another, more pernicious species. As is turns out, I may have been on to something.

I have not journaled my war against the ants this spring. I've not had time to record the events of this never-ending war because, quite frankly, the avenging hordes of ants have overwhelmed my defenses. They were in the kitchen, the bathroom, the laundry room, the living room, the boys' rooms, my office, and even the fireplace. The only sanctuary we had was the master bedroom. I used all the same tactics that I used last spring: baiting with Spinosad, baiting with boric acid laced honey, DE, DE laced with boric acid, and even scalding water. But nothing I did slowed the invaders.

So, I called for reinforcements. After a little research on the Internet, I found the perfect mercenary force to call on for aid. This pest control company agreed to the original Rules of Engagement. The legionnaire that came to my aid was a lethal combination of hunter and warrior. He crawled around the house armed with a flashlight and a can of aerosolized orange oil. Looking in every nook and cranny on the inside, overturning every rock and stone along the outside, he hammered about fifteen colonies of sugar ants around the perimeter of the home, and laid bait and set physical barriers for all the ants still finding their way into the home.

For one week, we were largely free of ants. Last week, I called him back out.

The Ant Wars: A Winter Campaign

A few weeks ago, we discovered one of the curses of a bitterly cold winter night.  A hot water pipe cracked. I can live with the burden of repairing a busted pipe, but this pipe was burst at some point within our concrete slab. The water was leaking into a space underneath the hot water heater. This space is probably close to 18 cubic feet of space, perhaps a bit more. Needless to say, the repair was expensive.

When the plumber cut away the sheet rock to expose the space under the hot water heater, I was at once amazed and mortified at the discovery.  The sight was, for my struggle, the equivalent of finding WMDs in Iraq. Like the Hebrews at Mossad, or the Rohirrim at Helms Deep, or even the Viennese anticipating the advancing Ottoman armies; there at the gates, laying siege to my fortress, was the siege-works of a mighty colony of ants. This colony of mighty ant warriors consumed nearly half the space in the chamber below our hot water heater with their mound. Only ten feet from the heart of our home, from the room we hold most dear - the kitchen.

But God does work in mysterious ways. For you see, the cold weather that caused the leak in our hot water pipe was the end of that ant colony stealthily positioned at our gates. The hot water scalded and killed the furtive formicidae. This further proves my thesis that God is constantly mocking us. Since I had prayed that He would rid our home of ants and He chose a busted pipe as the answer. I am constantly amazed at His creativity in answering prayers.

I must commend my enemy, though; he took great risk to life and limb, staked out a position that I would be most unlikely to discover, and raided our stores unmercifully. But for a busted pipe, his stealth would have remained beyond my gaze and beyond the targeting of my weapons.

The war has just intensified, however, as I have learned more of my enemy's methods. The challenge for the spring offensive will be to find new methods and new weapons to infiltrate their hidden habitat.

The Ant Wars - Woe to the Weak Willed

From Lincoln, Nebraska a news story was published today that provides some advice for homeowners struggling with ant infestations. The reporter and the "expert" she consulted are clearly people without the vision and tenacity to actually win this war.

At the conclusion of Barb the ant expert's recommendations, her (not-so) encouraging advice is, "good luck." The tenor of the article is clearly not the supportive and encouraging "good luck," but the you-don't-have-a-snowball's-chance-in-hell kind of "good luck."

To these nay-sayers I reply, "Man up!" As I have clearly demonstrated in my battles with the ants, it is possible to win this war or at least reach a sort of rapprochement. There will be days when the cause seems hopeless. You may feel there is no chance at victory. But consistent, concerted, multi-dimensional attack plan will result in victory.
For all those struggling in their war with the ants, have faith, be strong, and you will be victorious.

Not like those defeatist Cornhuskers. It's no wonder their football team sucks.

The Ant Wars: An Act of God

Oncor blames fire ants for power surge in Carrollton homes News for Dallas, Texas Dallas Morning News Latest News

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For those of you in the unenlightened corners of the world that have yet to discover electricity deregulation, Oncor is the regulated portion of our deregulated electricity delivery system in Texas.

Oncor has the nerve to call an ant infestation in a tranformer an "Act of God."

For those of you who have been following my tales of The Ant Wars, you will have to come to the conclusion that ant infestations cannot be an "act of God," but can only be an "Act of Satan."

Ants are evil little creatures that are constantly on the march of death and destruction against any one or thing they encounter.

Oncor clearly does not understand the destructive intention that ants have, and they are clearly unwilling to admit that the sentient intentions of ants cannot possibly be at the behest of the creator of time and space.

If you know the people affected by this electrical disaster, please refer them to my stories, so that they may have solace in their time of need.

The Ant Wars - Know Thy Enemy

There is a maxim of war that every great general must understand to be successful. Never underestimate your enemy! We must be constantly vigilant in our need to learn about our enemy, know its ways, discover its strenghts and its weaknesses through observation and through trial and error.

As with any war we must study. And it is in my studies that I have learned about The Smithsonian National Museum's exhibit that just started and will run through October 10, 2009. Perhaps we can take a late summer vacation up to D.C. to view the new exhibit, "Farmers, Warriors, Builders: The Hidden Life of Ants."

Perhaps the most daunting challenge we face is mechanical destruction of the mound. The Smithsonian has published a graphic of a cast of an ant colony's mound. It is deep, it is detailed and it is virtually impenetrable to its deepest chambers. In short it is frightening. You can see it by selecting the following link: http://www.mnh.si.edu/ants/photogallery/antsNest.htm

The Ant Wars - Mutiny?

The vast ant armies launched their version of the Tet Offensive. For about a week we were overrun, fighting back the invading armies with the best weapons in our arsenal. Orange oil mixture as a front line weapon, boric acid and D.E. to create an impenetrable barrier, Spinosad bait to take them out from within, and my thumb as a last resort.

Ants were everywhere, in the kitchen, in the sun room, in the boys' bedrooms, and in the master bathroom. The only defenses that proved worthy was the the defenses established at the very beginning of our war, the dining room.

Ants had gotten into our home to such an extent, we had to put cereal in the fridge, all dry goods went in zipper bags, and the dogs had twenty minutes to eat, then the food was picked up.

But one day last week, the offensive stopped. Oh sure, I'll see a lone ant scout every now and again, but for the most part, the ants are not entering the house.

I don't know why the ants aren't coming in anymore, but I have two theories:

1. The Spinosad baits and the boric acid applications are working. The colonies are sick, and the queen is dying.
2. I've noticed a couple of fire ant mounds in the yard. I noticed them at about the same time the little sugar ants stopped coming into the house. Is it possible that the more aggressive fire ants are attacking the sugar ant colonies and providing a mutinous distraction for the Ant Armies leadership?

If the latter is true, I may need to adjust my strategy to encourage an extended battle between the two ant clans. Is it so unthinkable in my effort to eliminate the sugar ants, that for now I actually encourage and support them so that their civil war becomes more protracted?
For now I'll wait and watch. I'll strengthen the defensive perimeter, I will attack my enemy's enemy, and I will table the tactic of sickening the queen with bait. This is a gamble, to be certain. But all too often it is in misplaced pride that the consequences end in disaster.

The Ant Wars: New Weapon Development

Could salvation from ants be just around the corner?

Our crack researchers have identified a potential new weapon against the most dangerous of the ant warriors, the fire ant. Through funding provided in part from our own resources, researchers at Texas A&M have identified a natural predator of the fire ant. There is a tiny phorid fly that lays eggs on the fire ants, and the eggs hatch into maggots inside the ant and eat away their brains.

Here is the story from the Houston Chronicle: http://www.chron.com/disp/story.mpl/headline/metro/6420449.html

This new weapon, once fully operational, could provide the tipping point we've been waiting for to control the invading armies.

The Ant Wars: Revisiting the Rules of Engagement

Now that we've discovered the home base of our enemy, a proposal has been proffered that violates the original rules of engagement. This suggestion comes from a member of the war council. As in any organization, there are two competing schools of thought. In our war with the ants the two schools can be loosely defined as follows:

1. War tactics define us as a people. While the ends are vitally important, the means by which we achieve those ends is a very prominent consideration in our approach to battle.
2. Securing the objective of the battle trumps any and all consideration of whether the means are humane, sustainable or even moral.

In our efforts to identify tactics that would significantly reduce the enemies ability to attack our home, one of the tactics proposed was a chemical bombdropped inside the container of the mailbox. The competing tactic is to surround the mailbox with baits, including the boric acid-honey baits, boric acid-D.E. baits, Spinosad, and, at the suggestion of a friend, instant grits.

After a contentous meeting with tears, screaming, begging and pleading (from me), the bait strategy was agreed upon for now. But tactics aside, the moisture we've had, both falling from the sky and the saturated soil are preventing our use of baits.

And there is another problem: we are now being attacked from our Northwestern corridor, and I cannot find the source of the attack or where the enemy is gaining access to our home.

The Ant Wars. Oh! My God!

The rain was heavy and lasted all morning. My defenses held, the ants, despite their habit of invading immediately after rain, have stayed outside for about 24 hours as of this posting. But the rains have revealed something far more ominous. It is perhaps both a blessing and a curse in this epic battle: I have discovered the source of the ant hordes power. I discovered their true home!

The rain has forced the ants to move their supply line from under the cover of the soil, plants and grass, to the drier paths above ground. With pureness of heart, Sue saw what I was unwilling to see: the ant hordes have a supply line that must extend at least 75 feet, extending from our mailbox all the way to our front doorstep. My initial reaction was, "Oh! My God!"

The ants have taken refuge in a fortress of stone that is our mailbox. Their supply lines are far more complex and far more extensive than I ever anticipated. Like attempting to melt the exposed part of an iceberg, my war will be never ending until I destroy the very foundation of the ants' power, their hidden base of operations, the home of the queen.

For now, I've placed boric acid baits along their supply line, but I fear the tools in my arsenal may not be enough to eliminate the threat. This will require a new level of ant control, perhaps even a new approach to hit the ants where they live.

Stay tuned...

The Ant Wars. In D.E. (diatomaceous earth) We Trust?

All is quiet along the Ant War front. The predicted rains didn't come this weekend, and as such, the ants did not invade. Over the course of the entire weekend, I spotted one ant. One! And I used a mechanical strategy for eliminating this solitary scout, my thumb.

The war plan now includes yet another stealth weapon in my fight to eliminate the threat of future ant invasions. I am now sprinkling a bit of diatomaceous earth (DE) on the dogs' food AND the cat's food.

As I've learned in this process of non-chemical pest control, there are two types of diatomaceous earth. The kind to use in Ant Wars is "food grade" DE. Food grade DE is a natural supplement used to help rid animals of intestinal parasites. DE is the fossilized remains of tiny little plants that grow in sea water. The fossils are covered in tiny jagged edges that can cut parasitic worms from the inside, resulting in their death. Sprinkling the DE on their food also discourages the ants from a readily available food source. So this one material has multiple benefits for the animals, protecting their food from ant invasions and keeping their intestines free of parasites.

I left the perimeter defenses in place from Friday, and this morning the rains came. The weather forecast is calling for rain all week, making my exterior defenses ineffective. With the Spinosad and exterior baits neutralized, we are forced to rely on the DE/boric acid mixture in the window sills as a mechanical defense, a few strategically placed boric acid/honey baits in the kitchen and we'll be using the orange oil spray as a surface cleaner and contact ant control.

May God be with us.

The Ant Wars. The Calm Before the Storm

The weather forecast calls for a decent chance of rain today and tomorrow. During our last rain event, the first great ant invasion took place, catching us off guard. I am determined to not be caught off guard again.

I spent this morning fortifying my defenses. I sprayed the kitchen surfaces down with orange oil, making sure to leave a heavy coating of the spray in the areas the evil ant armies prefer to attack. I put a dusting of the diatomaceous earth and boric acid mixture along all the window sills. There are a few strategically placed boric acid baits indoors in an effort to distract and confuse the enemy. I also sprinkled a tablespoon of diatomaceous earth on the dogs' food bowls to further discourage the invading hordes. My outdoor baits, especially the Spinosad, will probably be rendered ineffective due to the rain.

I've thrown my entire arsenal at the enemy.

The past few days have been eerily calm. I can almost hear the drumbeat of the advancing armies....

The Ant Wars. Re-establishing the Perimeter

The boric acid baits seem to be working. The ants have stayed outside ... mostly. A few hardy survivors have managed to put together some advance patrols, finding weaknesses in my defenses.

Yesterday I began the process of re-establishing my defensive perimeter. Since the easiest points of entry for the army of ants are through the window sills, I put a dusting of diatomaceous earth (D.E.) and boric acid along the base of the windows I have spied ants penetrating my home. I mixed the two products 10 parts D.E. to 1 part boric acid.

The next rain will truly test the strategies we've employed to defeat the relentless hordes of the great ant armies.

The Ant Wars. Sabotage!

The Great War of the Ants continues! We now have tools to keep the armies of invaders at bay with our orange oil concoction. (Did you know that my orange oil spray makes a good surface cleaner, too? Water it down a bit to use as a cleaner, just don’t use it on windows.) Our strategy now calls for a more aggressive attack upon our enemies. We will be going behind enemy lines for this next phase of the war.

The underlying idea of this attack is to distract and destroy. The weapon is bait, laced with poison and inserted into the enemy’s base and along their supply lines. I am using two different types of bait, in different locations, as a test to determine which bait is most effective. One of the baits is homemade, a mixture of raw honey and boric acid. The other is Spinosad granules. Spinosad is a byproduct of the rum-making process, so it must be deadly. It can be purchased from your local gardening store that carries organic supplies.

The homemade honey and boric acid baits are a long time favorite of “natural” pest control practitioners. I spent last night making the baits. For instructions on making the boric acid baits see my article, How to Control Ants With Honey.

I went around the house today in serach of ant nests and ant supply lines. I found two major supply lines. Those little bastards were finding their way in through three windows along the front of the house and the window in the master bathroom. I chose the front windows as my test location for the boric acid baits and the bathroom window as my Spinosad trial location.

In the Spinosad areas I sprinkled the granules liberally around the ants’ point of entry. Along the front of the house, I strategically placed the boric acid baits along the ant supply lines. After just a few minutes, the ants had abandoned their attack on the house and were sippin’ the Kool-Aid, so to speak. We will see what the results of the test are tomorrow.

The Ant Wars. Invading Hordes!

There everywhere! Crawling across the counters. Invading the pantry. Infiltrating my son’s bedroom. They are even finding their way into the master bathroom. We’ve been invaded!

I am forced to employ a strategy of direct contact to beat back this might invasion force. They are incessant in their attack, finding gaps in the perimeter, and making their way into places they are not invited. I hate ants!

True to the rules of engagement, I am now forced to employ a solution to this invasion.

Using a standard 32 oz. spray bottle, I filled it with water, added 1 oz. of orange oil and a drop of dish soap. I love this stuff! Use this concoction to spray directly on the ants. Within seconds, the ants are dead. Their little bodies literally melt. It’s great fun to watch.

In addition to direct contact, the ants won’t crawl through it. The problem is that the stuff evaporates pretty quickly, so it is useful as a temporary barrier only. BTW, orange oil spray will melt any critter with an exoskeleton, but is perfectly safe for pets and people.

So yesterday, the boys and I, each armed with orange oil spray searched the house looking for ants. Walking from room to room, we beat back the invading armies, watching the foot soldiers fall in battle, beaten back by our biological weapons. But I fear, our victory is only temporary. Further strategies are needed to weaken the enemy further.

It’s War! Rules of Engagement

We fired Terminix last month. Not because Terminix was ineffective (they were), but because we are trying to trim expenses in preparation for the collapse of the economy :-) . So that means I am in charge of pest control. Specifically, I am at war with the ants.

This war has a few rules that I will obey:

1. I will not use chemical pesticides that contain neurotoxins.
2. All tools of war will be limited to things I can buy at the organic landscape supply store or that I can personally consume with no ill effect.
3. I will only use “smart bombs” to specifically target the bad bugs (i.e. ants, roaches, aphids, fleas and ticks).

The tools I will employ include, but are not limited to:

• soap
• vinegar
• orange oil
• boric acid
• spinosad (a byproduct of rum-making)
• diatamaceous earth

Let the battle begin!